Things I love about Nathaniel

Nathaniel does so many little things that just make me smile. Here's a little video of some of those things:

I can't imagine a more prefect child. He's certainly the best little boy we ever could have hoped for.

Volunteering in the temple

On Saturday I got to spend three hours in the temple helping in the clothing area. First off, I didn't know that this was even a thing you could volunteer for, second, I had no idea it would be that amazing!

It was full of very simple tasks: fold this item, straighten these things on hangers, iron this or stack these. And everyone was doing them. From the supervisors to the new volunteers, (like me) no one was above doing any simple task no matter how repetitive.

And I loved the important attention to detail. Making sure that this thing was folded just so, and that these things were stacked all in a straight line. Checking for this popped seam or stray thread on each article of clothing. It was so fulfilling to do!

It must be because we know the temple is God's house, and all of us just wanted to give our very best to Him no matter how insignificant the task may have seemed.

To anyone seeking for meaningful ways to serve, this was definitely one of my favorites!

It's a......

We had the 20 week ultrasound yesterday, (oh, by the way, did I mention we're expecting again? I'm due October 26th. :)  and baby looks great! The nurse said everything was just how it should be.

And in case you're wondering...

It's a GIRL!

photo credit

Oh, and we already have one hair accessory for her. The first of many, I'm sure.

Little girl, Mommy and Daddy and Nathan all love you and can't wait to hold you and watch you grow into a beautiful woman. 

Graduation Trip to Boise

Chris's sister Isabel graduated this last weekend and we made the trip up there for the ceremony. It was a blast (but way too short of a visit)!

Our little family with the graduated girl!

This is one of my favorite photos from the weekend:

One of my favorite moments from this weekend happened Sunday afternoon. Grandpa Steve walked over to the kitchen counter and reached into a box of chocolate teddy grahams to munch on some. Nathaniel heard the rustling of the bag and went to investigate. Grandpa of course shared his teddy grahams with him, and Nathan went on his merry way to play. But for the next 45 minutes or so, if Grandpa went to the kitchen counter, Nathaniel would go on alert and watch him. If he reached for the teddy grahams, Nathaniel would start to walk over to him. If he rustled the bag Nathaniel would move quicker, and as soon as he saw a teddy graham in Grandpa's hand, he'd go right up to Grandpa and say, "Hi!" or, "mmm!"

Nathan totally knew how to work the system, and he and Grandpa were best buds afterwards.

Eye-opening

Depression, anxiety, feeling the blues. It's been a struggle for about a year now. I have so much support from those around me. Friends, family, loved ones, my Heavenly Father. I'm on a road to recovery, I just can't let myself dwell on how long or short that road will be.

This has been such an eye-opening experience for me. I feel an understanding for things that I've never understood. I feel connections for people going through things that I've never felt connected to before. I think if there's anything God wanted me to learn through this experience it would be empathy. It's an increased love and understanding for my fellow brothers and sisters who are also inhabiting this world.

A little example of increased understanding. In high school, I learned that some of my peers "self-harmed". I was totally confused. I thought, "umm... why would you cut yourself? That, like, hurts, so why would anyone do that?" It made absolutely no sense to me. Along comes depression, and with it, lots of unwanted feelings and struggles. I couldn't control those feelings and they were unpleasant to experience. What I did have control over was what I did about those feelings. Suddenly, I could understand why someone would want to replace emotional and mental pain with physical pain. It's not what I chose to do about my feelings, but depression has helped me see so much clearly why people might choose destructive behaviors themselves.

I can choose what to do with the unpleasant emotions that I face, and I choose to feel them and to work through them (or sometimes to just work alongside them). I can't erase them, but I can prevent them from controlling me, and I can choose to not stifle them out with destructive behavior.

I'm still in the middle of this muddle, so I can't really summarize all that this experience has taught and will teach me. But I'm grateful for the eye-opening-ness of it all. I'm so grateful that I knew about Lehi's dream in the Book of Mormon and so I knew what I should do when the mists of darkness came. I'm still in those mists, but I'm holding on, and I'm not letting go, no matter how long it takes.